After nearly four months, the Randomizer finally rolled a Neal Baer-era SVU for us to watch, and despite a slow beginning, "Design" really delivers the wild stuff we love. This episode was supposed to star disgraced former President Donald J Trump as a hot piece of genetic material who's disrupting the mortuary sciences industry. Instead it features a laundry list of famous faces with strange backstories. What kind of madness allows the Munchie Boys to say "electroejaculation" 21 times in a single episode? Listen and find out. We also learn some terrible news about Odafin Tutuola's taste in music. Somehow, this is a crossover episode that terminates in Law & Order "Flaw" (S16E2).

If Popular is any indication, being a kid actor on SVU in the early days was not for the faint of heart. They’ll either have you playing a scumbag turning out your girlfriend for whichever old reason, or they’ll have you perping on your best friend’s girl who isn’t into you but who he instructed to bone you anyway despite the fact that you can’t stand him, or they’ll have you get turned out, contract gonorrhea, have your parents find out you’ve become ensnared in a beej-for-beer barter middle-school party scene, and have everyone say you are not attractive. No complexes developed here…

This week, we meet an Irish-American father-of-daughters who is even angrier than our own, beloved, Stabler. However, instead of 'swinging from a pole,' said daughter is possessed of superhuman hearing and a charming inability to be "normal" due to her Williams Syndrome. Thankfully, our super daughter is able to help the SVUs get to the bottom of just how many dudes were in mom's bedroom the night she was attacked, and exactly which noises they were loudly producing.

In this week's episode Florida, the Munchie Boys are dragged into the Simon Marsden Saga, leaving them wishing they'd had been sent to Florida on a pointless side mission like Dean Porter was in this one. Alas, they're fully immersed in this Liv-servicing backstory, one which errs into some pretty painful narrative territory and squanders a golden opportunity to dive into what should be rich and interesting waters. There's a lot of next-level bad policework being done, and we're subjected to Olivia Benson channeling the worst impulses of Elliot Stabler, Amanda Rollins, and Nick Amaro in an episode in which nearly every action she takes is anathema to the character we’ve all known for 25 years.

The first installment of the Neal Baer era is a doozy, pitting our intrepid SVUs against the defense-industrial complex. In a momentary distraction from family time, which became all too common during his time on the Unit, Elliot Stabler is pulled away from his family--in this case Maureen, a daughter who follows instructions POORLY--for a case in which he literally cannot help but become embroiled. Sure, jurisdiction and the vic's very speculative status as a special victim as it burned to a crisp are real-life hurdles that are completely ignored as Stabler and the Unit dig into the vic's eventually uncovered extremely terrible past.

Along the way, we find out that the US government paved the way for an especially odious pedo to victimize innocent youths without any roadblocks or pushback. We also get a Stabler traumatized for the first time and the introduction of one of the most beloved characters in the entire L&O universe. Fun is had amidst the tragic but fairly realistic world in which our victims live.

NYPD officers who've been serving in Afghanistan are getting pretty violent, domestically, and the Unit has to race against a *gasp* journalist to get to the bottom of what's going on in this week's Ripped from the Headlines edition of SVU. The Army are very bad, doctors are huge cowards, and journalists may or may not be bottom feeders in this screed where no cows are sacred and no army wife is safe.

It wouldn't be a peak-era SVU episode if we weren't treated to an investigative red herring that eats up an entire act of television only to be discarded unceremoniously, forever forgotten and treated as though it never have happened. That misdirect usually isn't a NINE MINUTE NECROPHILIA KICK that plays as exploitative and shocking, leaving the audience's collective jaws on the floor, all while having the perp in question just brush up against the periphery of the Unit's case. It's a real shocker, and "Waste" provides it. It also has nothing to do with the pregnant woman in a permanent vegetative state who was knocked up while in the hospital.

***MUNCHIES' CHOICE***

When an older gentleman with a knife sticking out of his junk slumps against a Lexus belonging to the worst parker in Lower Manhattan, the unit embarks on an investigation which leads them into a delightfully well-run swingers club. Liv and Stabler go, possibly, a little too undercover and find themselves at the mercy of a legion of pawing hedonists. This being a Season Twelver, the plot careens wildly from red herring to red herring, but it's fun and saucy throughout. Thanks to our splendid Munchies for picking this as our Munchies' Choice episode this week!

For the second time, the Munchie Boys go back to the well from the earliest episodes of the podcast to reevaluate (with the benefit of having now seen and rated more than 170 episodes of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit) the truly brainmelting Season 3 banger, Ridicule, which gives us Casey Novak's very disturbing origin story before she changed her name from Amelia Chase. The world of SVU is upside-down in this one as women sexually assault men, tumescence exams are discussed, and autoerotic asphyxiation is de rigueur. And… Casey Novak—er, “Amelia Chase” is involved in almost all of that.

A dead, naked male prostitute is found in a cemetery which leads SVU from hell house to Long Island proto-mega church to the responsible brother from Wings to his accountant over the course of the investigation. Hilarity ensues assuredly.

The Munchies thought they were sending us down a dark and unprofessional path when they selected this haired-brained thriller of an SVU episode which begins with a dead Topekan tourist in Central Park, traverses a Lady From Shanghai-esque fun-house sequence in Coney Island, and tiptoes around all manner of Dale Stuckey-related content on its way to unceremoniously killing off one of Munch My Benson's favorite characters as a prelude to some kinky Liv and Elliot fan service. Little did they know, that we are just messed up enough to enjoy this wild, and very much not SVU, romp. Also, Adam suffers some very real life consequences from trying to record this episode in his bedroom.

Two dipshit wannabe writers on an uptown depravity tour lead the detectives at SVU into a truly outlandish world populated by avenging sister-moms and serial-rapists-made-good who are pushed back into serial raping by the heavy-handed approach of Stabler & Co. Along the way we learn about cleaning fish, proper wine breathing etiquette, and whether or not Ricardo from the Java Barn is the right guy to ask for illicit hard drugs. This episode revels in the early season insanity. Does it make sense? Does it have to?

When television's Harry Bosch (technically Titus Welliver) started firing blanks a few years ago, the strangest thing happened. Instead of happily raising the large brood of children he already had, he chose to pimp out first his wife, then his nanny, and finally his own daughter in a bizarre cult-like scheme to rear as many children as possible. Obviously, things went off the rails, or in the case of his daughter, nearly on to them when she attempts to throw herself in front of the N train starting this week's SVU in motion. Along the way Adam tells you all about applying for pre-K in New York, and we wonder whether or not NYPD could conceivably plant evidence beneath two feet of concrete under your townhouse.

Another SVU, another bizarre cult. This time around, a certifiable quack of the cloning-will-save-humankind-from-the-depleting-ozone-layer variety has an entire organization hornswoggling teen girls with low self-esteem into becoming his own personal baby factories. Don't worry, it's not just non-sexual sex cult action we're dealing with this time around. No, we've got police brandishing their weapons and running hilariously, accents that spin you around, and surprising restraint from a cult leader who seems much more interested in playing God than hide the salami. Of course, talk of claims of human cloning took Adam down a strange rabbit hole into the Raëlians, and there are some wildly unexpected revelations with regards to this week’s guest stars, so there’s a ton of munchy weirdness afoot this week.

Alt episode title this week? Her Mouth Is a Melting Pot.

In an episode Adam already covered on his guestisode of the These Are Their Stories Pod, we watched a preposterous reimagining of the various Michael Jackson sexual abuse allegations in which an uber-wealthy toy mogul lures children into his low-rent pirate-themed sex lair to dress them up in precious pajamas and have his way with them. Was it fun? Yes, absolutely. Did it feature enough lemur? Sadly, no.

This installment of SVU pits very recognizable teacher against an also recognizable student in a he-said-she-gonorrhea'd-me/she-said-he-raped-me exercise in who can we believe for the Unit and the audience. Sure, the teacher is Sabrina/Clarissa, but if we know anything about this show, it's hard to believe the potentially stuntcasted. And, yeah, the kid is basically known for playing quiet lunatics, but they can't both have done it, right? This one's fun AND strains credulity in all the best ways.

What happens when a trusted pediatrician is found to have extra-medically milked many young boys urethras over the years? Well in SVU, he is brutally beaten to death by one of his former victims who himself was doubly victimized as his Pica led him to eat the lead paint off of cheap toy cars which permanently stunted his development and planted the seeds of his rage. Come for Alexandra Cabot's jaw dropping Season 10 return, stay for Kim Greylek's unceremonious act 2 poochie'ing, and go home with a delightfully detailed breakdown of what exactly blood alcohol content means and whether or not the arrogant rich guy could have blown a 2.2 and kept driving.

Helen of Troy might have had the face that launched a thousand ships, but this gem of a Season 12 SVU is the problematic hellscape that launched the Munch My Benson ranking system. Kids are never safe in SVU, and in this episode we see kids casually listing their prostitution fees, kids getting Meet-Joe-Blacked outside of a farmers' market, kids getting chained up and forced to drink cyanide, and kids destroying a bespoke, heirloom blueberry compote. This is one hell of a ride. Enjoy!

We let the Munchies pick this week's episode, and by god did they pick an all-timer. Everybody's favorite cool uncle, John Stamos, shines as a reproductive abuser, and Lori Singer is but the most famous of his many, many victims. This one really has everything we here at Munch My Benson are looking for out of this unique series. Thank you for this marvelous choice!

When a sting to catch a groomer pedo goes sideways in a New Jersey train station, Alexandra Cabot disregards due process, civil rights, and decades of precedents in the pursuit of a conviction. We see the SVU debut of everyone's favorite legal hard ass, Elizabeth Donnelly, we learn about a particularly outlandish purchase that Josh is contemplating, and we definitively answer that age old question: Who's the boss? Those wanting Adam's airport rankings or our views on the relegation system in world football are encouraged to sign up for the Munchies tier on our Patreon. Enjoy!